Glorious sunsets, breathtaking sunrises, beautiful water, and exotic locations; this is what you see on social media in Facebook posts and YouTube videos. Before our leap to full-time boat life, we tried to imagine what the day-to-day reality of living on a boat would be; surely there is struggle, strife, and stress? If you take social media and YouTube at face value, it is romantic, peaceful, and glorious. And it is.
It is also stressful, messy, physical, and demanding on relationships.
Stressful from continually living in the unexpected and unknown. From encountering unexpected fog to sudden mechanical breakdowns, running aground, and constant boat repairs, you will experience it all. It is not a carefree existence. It takes planning, patience, and the ability to plan, not to have a schedule. You are now at the mercy of the weather, and it is vital to respect her terms. Immense personal stress for me is feeling awkward when learning something new, being uncomfortable, and feeling like I am not 110% competent.
Messy is from living in a harsh, unforgiving, and small environment. The boat needs daily cleaning, constant organizing, and frequent repairs. Saltwater damages, wind, and waves knock things over, fighting dust and mold is a constant battle. The small space can quickly become disorganized. It takes discipline to put things away immediately. Everything must have a place.
Physical as in physically demanding. I reach, bend, twist, stretch and walk more than when I lived on land. Everything is now more challenging, getting groceries, doing laundry, and getting supplies. Doing those three things can now take all day. Dishes are washed by hand, and laundry is an ordeal; vacuuming and cleaning are daily. There are lines to handle, fenders to place, stairs to climb.
This lifestyle is demanding on relationships because we live in a much, much smaller space. We joke that we are never more than 2 feet from each other. Even as I write this, he is next to me correcting this blog post. After 23 years of marriage, we are discovering new things about each other. Roles and who does what is robustly and actively renegotiated, communication needs to be crystal clear, and finally, we give each other grace.
Some people react to all this and stop boating. Others lean in and embrace it. I have learned to be comfortable with feeling awkward at first, trusting instead of controlling, and adjusting my expectations. Stress is part of the adventure; messy and physically demanding keeps me fit. I am now in better physical condition than I have been in years. Relationships can grow more profound and more robust. I no longer take anything for granted, and I am profoundly more grateful for the simple and every day.
At the end of a tough day, you can look around you and say, wow. This lifestyle is worth and part of the experience of discovering new places, the wonder of watching wildlife, and the joy of simply being. How lucky I am.
This is what I wished I would have known. And now you know it too.
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